Dear Lois Lowry,
Being a perfectionist, I want everything to be just right- all of my pencils in a line, my hair perfectly straight, my silly-bandz in order. I try to always act perfect, no matter what I actually feel. That's kind of what happened in The Giver. In order for the human race to be perfect, the rulers took away all of the bad things in life: war, disease, pain. Yet, that "perfection" came with a great price. There's no love, no freedom, no color, no diversity, no sunshine. The Giver, however unsettling of a book, taught me about what it means to be perfect.
I have OCD. No, that doesn't mean I just wash my hands a lot. It's really a lot deeper- an obsession, a need, a yearning to become perfect. I try to be the shoulder to cry on, the one who never gets angry, the one with a smile on her face. But it's not who I really am. Most people forget that I get sad, angry, and frustrated sometimes, too. I just don't show those feelings. I just set myself up for disappointment.
After reading The Giver, I learned that if I don't express my feelings, I'm acting like the people in Jonas's world. The effects for striving for perfection are not always good. In an attempt to be perfect, I lose some of the things that make me, me, the things that really count, like being a better daughter, student, and sister.
Unfortunately, I haven't gotten to this point yet. I realize my imperfections, but I’m not okay with them. I'm secretly embarrassed. I try to act confident and beautiful, but on the inside, I feel insecure and homely. An example of this is my mole. I have a mole on my upper lip, kind of like Cindy Crawford's. I hate it. I hate to think that that's what people see when they first look at me, what they remember about me. It's not, 'Hey, she has beautiful blue eyes!' or 'She was really nice!' Instead it's 'What's on her lip?', or that's why I think they're thinking.
But there are things about me that I value, too. I'm a great student, and I really love, art, music, and poetry. If I lived in a world like Jonas's, there would be no art or music. I just can't imagine my life without those things. The Giver taught me that it's a blessing to be me because if I'm like everyone else, I wouldn't be me at all. I'm lucky to have all the things that I have, like music and poetry. I can't compromise myself to be this imaginary thing we call 'perfect.'
Thank you, Lois Lowry, for teaching me that it's okay if I'm not perfect. If Jonas would've been perfect, he would've hidden all of his sadness and anger, and then poor baby Gabriel would've been released. Like him, I'll try to realize my purpose in life. My brain says I should go into science, but my heart strives for literature and beauty. I can't entirely decide now, but I know that The Giver will help me when I need to make this decision. One thing I'll always remember it that through Jonas's imperfection, he achieved greatness, and maybe someday, with a little effort, I will too.