April Mohler
Level III - Third Place - April Mohler, Lamoni High School
Fat Chance by Leslea Newman
Dear Ms. Newman,
How could you possibly know so perfectly the feelings so many of us girls are going through right now? Were you once experiencing the same feelings? How could you know the right words to express those hard truths with such clarity and sensitivity?
Your book, Fat Chance, really hit a raw nerve with me, and I'm sure that other girls who read this book would experience some of the same emotions that I felt. Judi's diary was full of honest language and feelings that most people can't even admit to themselves. I drew many parallels between Judi's life and my life throughout the book.
I've never acted out my negative emotions in such a profound way as Judi did, but I completely connected to so many of her reasons for doing things. When I'm stressed out, I go into a carb craze and stuff my face with food until I don't feel anything anymore. That's kind of how Judi dealt with some of her problems in the beginning of the book. Then her negative self image caused her to develop the eating disorder of bulimia. I really relate to Judi's self image issues, and from what I hear, many of my friends would as well. I, too, got the large bone structure from my dad's side of the family. But, that wasn't all I got from my gene pool. I also got Mom's low center of gravity (ie: thighs, hips and butt).
Judi's eating disorder started out as a diet. She'd fail her diet and become increasingly frustrated with herself. I've thought about starting a diet. Occasionally I have made the effort to improve my eating. Usually, however, the effort only lasts half a day as I get a carb craze every afternoon after a stressful day at school. I don't beat myself up as much over it as Judy. In fact, ever the pessimist, I never fully expect that I'll succeed for any length of time.
I have friends that are skinny like Judi's friend Monica in Fat Chance, and I admit I sometimes compare myself to them. I've always been the one to tell them they look great and to stop complaining while I'm wishing I was as skinny as them. I don't tend to complain to my friends as much about my weight as Judi, but I often feel the urge to vent it.
I also feel a connection to Judi's skinny friend, Monica. She's a music freak like I am, although she specializes in one instrument and I just play them all. Music definitely cuts into my time for friends and adds to my stress, but I couldn't live without it.
Judi's weight loss was spurred on by the thought that boys would like her better if she was skinnier. Many girls, including myself, think about how they should change to make boys like them better. Many think, like Judi, that being skinnier will make them more attractive to boys. Others, like myself, think of different improvements to make. I thought that dancing would be attractive. Unfortunately, dancing is as hard as losing weight for me. I just don't have enough confidence to do it.
Fat Chance vocalizes the unrealistic expectations set for girls and the expectations girls set for themselves with brutal honesty. I'm not the type of person who likes to analyze herself, but this book really made me think about my self-perception. Not only is your book an excellent book, it could help many conflicted teenagers, like me, understand and live with their problems. Thank you for your valuable words of wisdom.
April Mohler
